I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
