Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
