and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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