girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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