Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
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