Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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