if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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