I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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