apparently the secret to your success is patron
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
