32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
