you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
