I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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