god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
