wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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