Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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