woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
