Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
