whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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