Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
