Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
