remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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