Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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