You were right. It hurts to walk today.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Randomize
