i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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