She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
