bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Randomize
