his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
