Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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