Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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