so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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