We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
