Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize
