That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
