She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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