i just had sex bonerless
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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