Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
This is classic penis vs brain.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
