At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
