The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
