Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
