when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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