That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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