I am puke
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
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