I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
