I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
