You can't special order awesome
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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