there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
