I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
