Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
