If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
