You're completely useless in the revolution.
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
